Topic Title: SJW for bad moods (not depression)
| |  "SJW for bad moods (not depression)"
, Sat 4 Mar 14:14
My husband has a problem with anger and irritability. He lets the smallest things get to him and then we all pay for his bad moods. I wouldn't say he is depressed, just extremely irritable. Will SJW help him?
Posts: 0 | | Registered: Sat 4 Mar 2006 14:6 |
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| |  "Re(1):SJW for bad moods (not depression)"
, Sun 5 Mar 09:46:
Sorry songbird, but my opinion is that SJW will NOT help. As you can see if you read this SJW forum, many people have very different responses (some get hyper - like me, some get very very sleepy).
But, one common thing I see a lot of people post is exactly what you want to solve - the SJW *causes* them to feel more anger and irritability. In fact, if you read these posts, you'll see how frustrated we ourselves are at easing our own irritability now that it has become a side-effect of our SJW regime.
As someone who has irritability problems, all I can say is that I've gotten the best, most-long-term, and self-satisfying solutions from: #1 regular excercise, #2 low sugar diet, #3 taking several deep breathes before even THINKING about a response, #4 lots of zen and buddhist reading and practice.
That said, I'm a pretty negative female. I don't see men take steps #3+4, or even #1+2 if they can help it (see, I'm in the same situation with my own husband, and he refuses to reading any "silly" books, esp zen stuff). I guess he thinks it hurts his ego or something. I try gentle suggestions, but I'm not good at that and it took me over a year to try that more-productive route (versus just getting mad at him. Might get an immediate response, but not necessarilly well-accepted). One of the only things that has influenced a change in him is that he finally understands that I won't live with his anger much longer.
Please - check other people's responses. Like I said, everyone is different. Also - many people have discussed herbal remedies they use to relax. I'm drinking ginseng tea. I also have an herbal tincture called "Calming". When I get upset, I drop 5 drops under my tongue. Isn't the only solution, but another thing that helps. I don't want to name others, because I can't remember. Maybe spend some time to read through these posts.
Good luck!!
[this message was edited by ravengrrrl on Sun 5 Mar 09:54]
Posts: 34 | | Registered: Wed 7 Dec 2005 20:28 |
| | | "Re(2):SJW for bad moods (not depression)" , Mon 6 Mar 14:41
A certain model for depression claims that it is when we make the sub-conscious demands along the gist of " people SHOULD act in a way to my liking." or that when we insist that the "world MUST go to my ideals otherwise its terrible" that this creates tremendous anger internally towards the world and others and hence irritability. Instead of accepting life as it is some people try to impose their judgment as if they are omnipotent gods, unfortunately the universe doesnt care about our thoughts.
It is saner and healthier for us TO PREFER that the world goes in a different direction or that people behave differently but when we start to ABSOLUTELY INSIST till we are blue in the face we tend to get angry.
Posts: 12 | | Registered: Thu 3 Nov 2005 13:54 |
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