Topic Title: SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER....Newbie !!!
| |  "SOCIAL ANXIETY DISORDER....Newbie !!!"
, Wed 4 Jan 05:05
Hi All,
Happy New Year!
I have Social Anxiety Disorder, and have tried Paxil. it works, but the side effects are NOT worth it.
How truly effective is St. John's Wort in helping? What would be the dosage for SAD? And what is the BEST and most natural one/brand to buy?
(Note: I am currently taking Relora 3x250mg/day).
Thanks !
Posts: 0 | | Registered: Wed 4 Jan 2006 5:3 |
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| | "help with SAD" , Wed 4 Jan 07:50
Always one to try and offer information which may help others I noticed this thread on shyness,as well as on another board on Kelly's wonderful site.
I suffer with shyness though these techniques have really helped me:
I thought a lot of people may benefit from this article which is to be found on Albert Ellis' research site.
Dr Albert Ellis is the developer of REBT (Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy). He is currently having a lot of problems with the institute he set up with people making false accusations and allegations against him, but is regarded as one of the best pyschologists of this time, and has poured the money of the 75 books he has written, and all the money he has earnt back into The Institue he bought and set up in New York.
A quick explanation of the A B C model;
A= activating event = party
B= Belief system = what you think to yourself at the party
C= Consqeuence = How you feel and what you do at the party
Question: What is shyness and how can I overcome it?
Dr. Albert Ellis Answers: Shyness can be quite normal and sensible—as when you shy away from doing things you really don’t want to do but in a moment of weakness you promised to do. Or when you shy away from staying too long with difficult and boring people. Good.
Most of what we call shyness, however, results from fear of rejection and of being disapproved. Thus, you avoid approaching people who you think will find you inferior. When you are illegitimately shy, you first rationally tell yourself, “I do not like being rejected, and wish I get accepted by people I favor.” This Rational Belief (RB) and feeling leads you to avoid “dangerous” people and to try to get accepted by others. Fine. But when you are very shy, you add an Irrational Belief-feeling, “I absolutely must not ever be rejected! If I am, it’s awful, and I can’t stand it! Rejection makes me, a person, totally inadequate! Horrors!”
Your second, Irrational Belief-feeling (IB) scares you witless and drives you to avoid any people who might possibly reject you and thereby prove “your utter worthlessness.” It creates your disturbed shyness. It makes you manufacture your scariness.
If Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) is correct about this, what can you do to reduce your disturbed shyness? Try the following actions:
1.Fully see that you choose to create your shyness. It doesn’t merely come from an Activating Event or Activating Situation (A). You choose to Believe and to feel it at B, your Belief-feeling.
2. Fully realize that you don’t have to choose Irrational Belief-feelings at B about a situation where you may be rejected. You can instead choose a Rational Belief-feeling (RB), such as, “I greatly dislike rejection but still can stand it and fully accept myself, me, when and if I don’t get it.” Give yourself, with this philosophy, Unconditional Self-Acceptance (USA). Completely accept your entirety in spite of your failing to get accepted.
3. Give yourself, in addition, the REBT philosophy of Unconditional Life Acceptance (ULA)—that is, “I fully accept my life, my ongoing existence, whether or not I get what I want. I definitely prefer, but do not need, what I want, such as social acceptance. It’s bad when I get rejected and don’t get what I want, but I can try next time to get it. My rejection is part of my life but it doesn’t equal me. I can still get a great deal of happiness in life in spite of this particular rejection.It doesnt make me a rejectble person, Im merely a human being. Too bad—but not awful.”
Your seeing that irrational rejection really is a choice to reject you totally when someone rejects you in part, and you see that this is an irrational choice for you to make. This will stop you from denigrating yourself if and when others reject you. Then you have nothing to lose by unselfishly trying and trying again for social acceptance.
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Posts: 4 | | Registered: Thu 3 Nov 2005 13:54 |
| | | "re" , Thu 5 Jan 20:55:
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[this message was edited by Floyd on Fri 6 Jan 16:53]
Posts: 2 | | Registered: Thu 5 Jan 2006 20:42 |
| | | "Re(1):help with SAD" , Thu 5 Jan 20:53
Hi, I have had SAD for nearly 18 years, and suffered from shyness as a kid as I was constantly humiliated at school as a kid.
Wen I was 22 I crashed into myself in a college library after a comment was made at me and it's changed me from being an openly friendly guy to a hermit ever since.
My problem isn't with strangers because anonymity is a comfort, its like almost being invisible - but its rather with people close to me. Eye contact is almost impossible !
My life is cold and my only comfort is my cat.
I dont know why I have this self-destructive characteristic to me, but what can I do? I've tried Paxil/seroxat on and off for the last 5 years and it takes time to work like 2 weeks and it has helped but I hit another crash and would like to know what I can do now that I have started SJW for one day ?
Happy New Year.
Posts: 0 | | Registered: Thu 5 Jan 2006 20:42 |
| | | "Re(1):help with SAD" , Wed 4 Jan 14:04
I wish it were that simple !! My problem is I have to go back to uni tomorrow and am absolutely dreading it. When you are sitting in a room full of strangers where everyone else knows one another, it is very hard to feel comfortable by just telling yourself I don't care about being rejected, I know cause I have tried ! The awful thing about social anxiety is that your mind goes blank so even if some generous soul does decide to say a few words to you, you can't really think of too much to say back and the conversation soon dries up. I have been taking sjw for three weeks for depression but am hoping that it will also relieve my social anxiety. Hope sjw works for you solid :-)
Posts: 3 | | Registered: Tue 13 Dec 2005 13:35 |
| | | "Incapacity to make conversation" , Thu 5 Jan 07:31:
Yep, Social Anxiety or rather Performance Anxiety can be a saddening and debilitating condition. It leads to frustration.
My understanding is that the belief "I CANNOT think of anything to say" could pherhaps be replaced with "Id like to think of something to say so that people find me interesting and not boring or dull, but If I cant it isnt terrible. I can try and be more conversational as I start to feel more relaxed around these people."
Also accepting myself as a shy and quiet person has paradoxically made me more outgoing.
The neurobiological model I have come to understand is, that as anxiety increases, bloodflow decreases from the parts of our brain that think constructively, i.e the frontal lobes that make conversation, enable us to do maths etc,resulting in a poorer capacity to perform constructively in situations that provoke anxiety, and instead the blood flows to the lower animal brain which results in negative and saddening thinking- like an animal trapped against a wall- ready for flight or flight.
The plant Rhodiola Rosea (which can be taken in tablet form from health food shops) has been known to help with social anxiety as it is a mild MAOI (increases serotonin, dopamine) which also increases bloodflow to the brain, helping with cognitive capacity.
Kava Kava is also a mild tranquilizer which may help promote feelings of calm whilst boosting intelectual capacity.
Im currently learning a lot about this so will try and keep the board informed.
Good luck and best wishes to everyone. Happy New Year
[this message was edited by papuanewguinea on Thu 5 Jan 07:38]
Posts: 6 | | Registered: Thu 3 Nov 2005 13:54 |
| | | "Re(1):Incapacity to make conversation" , Fri 6 Jan 09:03
Posts: 7 | | Registered: Thu 3 Nov 2005 13:54 |
| | | "Re(1):Incapacity to make conversation" , Thu 5 Jan 10:06
Wow, thanks for sharing all the in-depth info, paupanewguinea! That is exactly the kind of info I hoped to see on this board. I understand that many people are debilitated by their depression. Its hard to care enough to write, let alone think that other people care about what you think is important.
But we do care! We do want to know! There is so much info out there, it can be overwhelming. I appreciate when others summarize some of their favorites for me.
Posts: 15 | | Registered: Wed 7 Dec 2005 20:28 |
| | | "Re(2):Incapacity to make conversation" , Thu 5 Jan 11:57
Yes thank-you papuanewguinea, Happy New Year to you too !!
Posts: 4 | | Registered: Tue 13 Dec 2005 13:35 |
| | | "Thanks!" , Fri 6 Jan 09:00
Thanks for the kind thoughts and hopefully some of this information will help people who socially anxietise themselves like me.
Chuck the "disorder" bit out of the window, we ARE ALL perfect in a sense, but just happen to be running slightly faulty software in our heads which leads to dysfunctional behaviours and attitudes and hence emotion, as well as a little bit of genetic programming.
But a "chemical imbalance" DOES NOT make you a victim.
Go OVER the info Ive given above, print it out and try and find ways of CONVINCING yourself of the more logical beliefs, until it may start to become more natural and habitual.
When you may come unstuck again and start to feel panicky, down, angry at yourself and your condition of mind say to yourself "Oh well,I might not be able to find much to say, but thats not terrible, and Im a fallible human being who doesnt have to be the perfect conversationalist!!! I can accept myself even if others dont!"
Another mistake we make as humans is to put ourself down for having anxiety,social anxiety etc, which actually makes the depression stuck. For instance some of us may think "I shouldnt be down and feeling so f****** miserable. This is terrible."
This could be changed to "Unfotuntely Im a bit anxious at the moment, but I can cope and with time it may go away." This will allow you to feel the displeasure and let it pass.
This will anchor your primary symptom, and eventually with time, help it to heal and may one day remove it, cos we dont get hung up over our tendency to upset ourselves.
Of course we will have troubles in the future, as well as a biological tendency to upset ourselves but we can try and do our best!!!!!!!!!
Posts: 6 | | Registered: Thu 3 Nov 2005 13:54 |
| | | "Re(1):Thanks!" , Fri 6 Jan 09:10
Posts: 8 | | Registered: Thu 3 Nov 2005 13:54 |
| | | "Re(2):Thanks!" , Thu 23 Feb 13:24
All,
I have severe Social anxiety and shyness. I've been taking Clarocet since Feb 20th. I am feeling huge difference. I feel less anxious and shyness when around people. I started talking to people with confidence.
Please try this product. Earlier I was taking Perika SJW. I didn't help me much.
Posts: 9 | | Registered: Thu 16 Feb 2006 13:45 |
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