Topic Title: 3.5 Month Update
| |  "3.5 Month Update"
, Thu 4 Mar 13:28
Hi all,
I tried to post a long-winded update about two weeks ago and it got deleted or lost... so here goes again.
I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder in Oct. 2003 and was admitted to the hospital for uncontrollable panic disorder after a dose of Celexa knocked me off my feet. I was taking 125 mcg of Synthroid for low thyroid as well. About a year prior to this, I started having constant surges of adrenaline which totally mystified me, as well as wiping me out. I was prescribed benzos, but they made me so achy and cranky after they wore off that I would not take them.
I started cognitive behavioral therapy in November 2003. I started acupuncture at the beginning of December 2003 for depression/panic attacks. Mid-December I began a once-daily 300 mg of Perika. (I tried gingko as well, as it was recommended by my Chinese medicine practitioner, but it gave me horrible nightmares.)
The Saint John's 1x daily dose reduced my panic disorder to anxiety attacks (illogical fears went away and only real-life problems gave me attacks.) I tried upping it to two in early January, but it gave me headaches and palpitations, so I went back down temporarily. I am very sensitive to meds, especially after the Celexa, so I have to raise the dose slowly.
I started to sleep through the night instead of waking constantly. I did not feel very much refreshed on awakening, but it was better than not being able to sleep at all!
The first dose did not help much with the depression, so in the 2nd week of February I raised it to 2 a day when I felt I had adjusted to it. The depression has improved. I tried raising it to 3 a day last week, but again with the headaches and palpitations. So I went back down to 2, where I'm at now. Oddly enough after I went back to 2, I started feeling a little manic for a couple hours after I took the pills.
I do think the Saint John's induces a little more anxiety for the first couple weeks of introduction into your system. I also have been experiencing memory loss and general brain slowness. It's kind of sad for me because my usual "rapier wit" is rather dulled, but it's definitely a trade-off (when I was unable to stop crying and get out of bed, my wit wasn't doing much for me!).
I also experienced a change in the quality of my dreams. As I raise the dose, they become much clearer and involve realistic, familiar people and places, rather than fantastical and slightly sinister mutations of places I know. I'm not sure what this means. I switched therapists recently to a more open-minded, energy-focused one, so maybe I will get to explore it more.
I still feel slightly dull emotionally, but it has been receding as I raise the dose. Honestly, I'm not sure what "normal" is supposed to feel like because I've been depressed for a looong time, so I'm just going to shoot for what makes me feel good. I.e. if I get a little manic when I raise my dose again, I'm not going to worry. However I am trying to deal with my anger, which surged upon the 2x daily dose. The 1x daily dose made it much easier to deal with my anger, so I find it kind of odd. It makes me wonder if SJW is somewhat like Effexor, where low doses increase serotonin and higher ones increase noradrenaline. Just a theory.
Oh, and my sex drive is back, thank goodness. After the Celexa wore off, I was still having painful/nausea-inducing orgasms with the 1x daily of SJW. 2x a day has fixed it significantly, though it's not quite as satisfying as it was when I was using sex as a stress-release. Oh well!
One more thing. On the 2x daily dose of SJW, I have been experiencing what I feel are fibromyalgia symptoms. I'm in the process of getting it checked out, but it's definitely related to my emotional state. I use acupuncture for it, which helps. The nice part about acupuncture is that it is often covered by insurance in California, and if you can find a Chinese medical school nearby, you can get very effective treatment for 1/3 the price, oftentimes.
In general I feel that the combination of therapy, SJW/herbs, and acupuncture has been a real godsend. I'm still not where I'd like to be in terms of connecting with people, but I have a ways to go still. Above all I try to keep a positive attitude and have less expectations, which is damned hard but a good building block.
Feel free to email me at redmouse27 AT hotmail if you want to chat or ask questions. I wish you all the best of luck!
Posts: 27 | | Registered: Mon 15 Dec 2003 17:52 |
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| | "Re(1):3.5 Month Update" , Mon 8 Mar 13:52
Redmouse,
I'm learning a bit about the whole anxiety/dperession thing. I posted on this site a little while ago and actually have been using a small dose of SJW for 2 months. The one thing that drove me to learn about SJW, etc... is memory loss/brain slowness that you eluded to in your post. I have noticed a marked decrease in my well-timed hilarity, and I think it's due to a lack of confidence that's resulted from some form of depression. I was hoping SJW would help, and maybe it has a little, but it has definately made me more self-concious and figity. I've actually thought about breaking down and going to see someone, but I don't want them to put me on perscription meds, and I don't really like talking about the way I feel. Anyway, I may decrease my SJW to see if the cloudiness lifts a bit.
Posts: 5 | | Registered: Mon 15 Dec 2003 12:27 |
| | | "Re(2):3.5 Month Update" , Mon 8 Mar 16:17
Hi tp17,
You know, if you're only using a small dose, you might want to actually try upping it for about a month to see if the effect you get is different. I found that the first dose yanked away the anxiety like a curtain, to reveal the depression. And the depression is likely to cause the same very annoying mind fog as the herb, sooo... I would recommend trying that, taking some ginkgo maybe (take it in the *morning* by the way)... and having your thyroid checked. A big part of my problem is trying to get my levels corrected and I am too low right now. I also am restarting a b-vit complex and omega oils, as well as upping to 3x daily SJW starting today. I'll repost in a month with my progress.
Posts: 29 | | Registered: Mon 15 Dec 2003 17:52 |
| | | "Re(3):3.5 Month Update" , Tue 9 Mar 07:24
I may try increasing my dose a little. I recently had my cortisol levels checked and they appear normal. I took a perscribed steroid (prednisone) for close to 10 years before weaning off last fall (I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis when I was 13), and theorized that the drug had damaging effects on the function of my thyroid. It is still my contention that prednisone-withdrawal shoulders most of the blame for my current stae.
I take Omega-3 for my ulcerative colitis, and have begun to incorporate b-complex vitamins into my vitamin diet. I've experience the best results from the B's. I've also been trying to reduce my alcohol intake - which played a large role in my recently concluded college years.
Thanks for your reply. Good luck with your new regimen.
Posts: 6 | | Registered: Mon 15 Dec 2003 12:27 |
| | "Re(1):3.5 Month Update" , Thu 4 Mar 21:07
When you mention getting fibromyalgia symptoms on the 2x day, are you feeling body aches? Three weeks into my trial on Perika, I just got progressively more achy and fatigued. I was taking Perika 3x a day. Are your symptoms fading at all with time?
Posts: 64 | | Registered: Thu 3 Apr 2003 5:33 |
| | | "Re(2):3.5 Month Update" , Thu 4 Mar 21:52
No. They are helped by two things. One is acupuncture, like I said. I go weekly for "calmative" treatments. It helps a LOT.
The other thing that helps is being careful of my moods. It is very obvious to me that I feel worst in body after I get angry or sad, so I'm trying to change how I deal with things that aggravate or depress me. Basically, I try to do the meditation thing where you blank out your mind. I just don't think about them, even when I really *want* to stew on something. For me it's almost as if the train tracks got crossed in my body and now the stress signals becomes instantaneous aches. :-p
Posts: 28 | | Registered: Mon 15 Dec 2003 17:52 |
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