Knowing what you want

[Captive]

I've had mild depression, on and off, probably all my life and the most troubling feature of it is that I have never really known what I want out of life. I've just gone with the flow every time and done what's easiest, because I have no motivation to do anything. As a result, life has often seemed thin and insubstantial to me. I rarely think about the future any more, because it seems like there's nothing to look forward to.

Have any of you ever felt that you didn't know what you wanted out of life, and didn't even know how to find out? Have you got any recommendations of things that helped you with this?

[shy1]

Welcome back, Captive aka Daniel. I must have joined sometime after you stopped posting on the old forum. :spin:

I've spent most of my adult life with exactly the same feeling you described. Just going from one responsibility to the next with no clear plan or end game in sight. Now it's become an ingrained behavior that is tough to change. :frown:

Even though SJW helped, I'm still not particularly motivated. Not sure any of this will help either you or anyone else, but these are things I do that help:

1. Became active in my church. New friendships, more reasons to belong and added meaning to life. A sense of community.

2. Make sure I'm properly hydrated. It has made a definite positive difference in how I feel ... emotionally as well as physically.

3. Make time to do activities I enjoy, including but not limited to bird hunting, hiking, snow shoeing, bicycling, and disc golf. I want my exercise to be fun!

4. Although I try to eat foods that are good for you, I also eat foods that I truly enjoy. I've found it is important to try to enjoy life.

5. Participate in this forum. It has helped me to heal, both sharing my experiences with others as well getting guidance from my friends here and trying to help those that I can. Self therapy.

The success of the SJW coupled with other activities have helped me form a solid personal base and inner peace that I really haven't had before. I feel good. This allows me to face the future with hope. A lotta late, but now that I'm in my mid fifties I am finally ready to begin solid planning for retirement. I'd say that is definitely planning for the future. This is new, a future with direction.:laugh:

[Captive]

Thanks! :smile:

I think you're right that friendships and a sense of community are important, and that is what seems to have gone wrong in my life lately. I've moved around a lot and lost touch with a lot of friends over the years, and now that I seem to have settled in one place the few friends I have left always want to drink themselves into a stupor when we meet up, which isn't what I want at all. Depression makes me very antisocial as well: after talking to people on the phone all day at work, I don't have the energy or desire to go out and meet people in the evening or on my days off.

When I took SJW before it really lifted me out of depression and helped me get out and enjoy life again, but did almost nothing for my motivation. I still felt directionless and a bit of an outsider, but I was happier so I didn't care so much. I wish I'd taken the opportunity to think seriously about who I was and what I really wanted. Maybe this time. :smile:

Glad to hear you are feeling good!

Dan