Getting help, when things are going from bad to worse (+8 replies) [Archive]

Kelly

19th February, 2006, 06:59 AM

October 29, 2002
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Karla </td><td align=right> </td></tr></table></td><td width="74%" bgcolor=#dddedd> <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/icons/frown.gif"> "Things are going from bad to worse" , Tue 29 Oct 13:32<HR SIZE=1> I'm really feeling miserable. Today I was feeling so depressed that I didn't go to school or work. I slept most of the day except for when I had to get up and take my SJW. I have very low self esteem. No matter how hard I try I can't feel good about myself. Not only do I have this problem but I also suffer from psoriasis, a bad skin condition that doesn't have a cure. I read on the internet that people who have psoriasis usually have low self esteem because of the condition and what really surprised me, which I didn't even know was that 400 people die from psoriasis each year. Yesterday and today I've been having suicidal thoughts. My life is so miserable that I don't see no way out. I don't want to go back to the psychiatrist because I'm afraid he'll make me take SSRI's and I refuse to take them.

<HR SIZE=1>Posts: 69 | | Registered: Tue 10 Sep 2002 15:9</td></tr></table> </TD></TR><TR><TD bgcolor=></TD></TR><TR><TD bgcolor= >
<table width=100% cellspacing="1" cellpadding="5" border="0"><tr> <td width="26%" bgcolor=#eeeeee valign=top> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpading=0 border=0><tr valign=top><td align=left> nick <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/faces/GreatBritain.gif" border="1" width="32" height ="32" ></td><td align=right> Home Page <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/home-1.gif" border=0> </td></tr></table></td><td width="74%" bgcolor=#dddedd> <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/icons/idea.gif"> "Keep your chin up Karla" , Fri 1 Nov 23:15<HR SIZE=1> Hi Karla, I?m no expert in depression, but I just know that I?am depressed. Nobody knows my body and mind better than me. On the mental side I struggle to be bothered or get involved in things. Always feeling tired and in my own world. On the physical side I feel tightness in my throat and chest area. I also feel a bitter taste in my mouth (could be the cortisol). This all sound farmiliar? I have been on SJW for 1 week and havent really felt anything kick in yet. I take this with B-complex tablets. These are just PART of the anti-depression fight back. We can?t just rely on these tablets to save us. What I wanted to say is that no matter how many tablets or prescription drugs we take, it still wont ever match the feeling of that "NARURAL HIGH" that we ALL used to have when young. As welI as the tablets, I try to meditate as much as possible. This helps calm things down. From this I learned that there is no such thing as bad times, only bad situations. Each situation is a hurdle which can be jumped over. Some you may need to climb to get over, and others you can simply cheat and run around. I know its easy to say but ?Nothing in life is worth worrying about? My depression stems from my parents. Even before they divorced, when things were bad, for some reason they stopped giving me, my bro and sis affection. This affection, no matter how old you are is the key to life, nothing else. I know I?m older now but my mother never hugs me or shows that she loves me, even though I know that she does, I still need for her to reinforce that. As a result I have no life, simple as that. I consider myself a great actor as I can put on a front to show people I?m ?normal?. I just look forward to the day that I get married and have kids. I would give them all the affection, love and attention in the world. But going back, meditation has helped me a lot. Its not just for those that believe in god like me. Anyone can meditate, even muggins over here, that?s the beauty of it. Just sit down in a quiet place close your eyes and think of what ever makes you happy. This could be God and heaven, nice childhood experiences, or a made-up world where you are just so happy. Try it and see. There is no right or wrong way. With my new attitude of ?nothing in life is worth worrying about? I can now slowly start to notice the difference, and it is only slight, but still a difference. I?am no where near as happy as I was, but I?m not scarred anymore. I?m past worrying all the time and look forward to that great day that I get what we all deserve, HAPPINESS.

<HR SIZE=1>Posts: 2 | | Registered: Sat 19 Oct 2002 9:54</td></tr></table>
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elizabethe </td><td align=right> </td></tr></table></td><td width="74%" bgcolor=#eeeeee> <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/icons/posticon.gif"> "Re(1):Keep your chin up Karla" , Sat 2 Nov 05:07<HR SIZE=1> Karla, Would like to hear how your doing.?

<HR SIZE=1>Posts: 14 | | Registered: Thu 10 Oct 2002 5:53</td></tr></table>
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Karla </td><td align=right> </td></tr></table></td><td width="74%" bgcolor=#dddedd> <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/icons/posticon.gif"> "Re(2):Keep your chin up Karla" , Sat 2 Nov 12:53<HR SIZE=1> Hi Elizabethe. I went to see my school counselor and he was very nice. I got the impression that he didn't fully understand depression, well he's not a psychiatrist so I didn't expect him too. I told him how I've been feeling and he told me that I should get myself involved in more social activities. I was very nervous sitting in his office speaking to him although he was very friendly. He wants me to see him once a week but I'm so nervous that when I was in his office I couldn't keep still and I started giggling alot. I may have given the impression that I wasn't depressed since I was giggling but I was nervous, not happy at all. I might get a nerve tonic to see if that helps control my nerves. I also get this way around my family. I just bought 5-HTP and I take 100mg a day along with Kava John and B Complex. Only time will tell to see if it helps. Hopefully the Kava John will calm my nerves down some but I have a feeling I may need something stronger.

<HR SIZE=1>Posts: 71 | | Registered: Tue 10 Sep 2002 15:9</td></tr></table>
<table width=100% cellspacing="1" cellpadding="5" border="0"><tr> <td bgcolor="" width="10%"> </td><td width="16%" bgcolor=#eeeeee valign=top> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpading=0 border=0><tr valign=top><td align=left> nick <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/faces/GreatBritain.gif" border="1" width="32" height ="32" ></td><td align=right> Home Page <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/home-1.gif" border=0> </td></tr></table></td><td width="74%" bgcolor=#dddedd> <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/icons/smile2.gif"> "My Current Status" , Sat 2 Nov 11:16<HR SIZE=1> Hi There Karla, So, you wanna know how im doing so far eh! OK. But if Im going to be of any use to you, I need to tell you the whole truth. Im not gonna sit here and type a whole load Bull**** just to make you feel better, because thats unfair to you. I used to have days where I would just sit in my room and feel like crying. Being a guy, I kept thinking to myself, "what are you doing, things cant be that bad that you need to cry". I relate myself to that Jim Carey film, ?Me Myself and Irene?. It?s a funny film, but a lot of people relate to it. In my case, I let everyone rule my life until I started to rebel and do silly things. When I began to face the facts, (that I was depressed) It first scarred me. This shook me up and I began researching into the whole subject of depression. Eventually I ended up finding out about SJW and so began my recovery programme. I know feel much better and more confident. I know that this is going to be a long and winding road, but what else is there. I cant afford to sit back and let depression ruin my future. Other people are affected by my attitude and personality, therefore this is my only alternative. The key is to read other peoples stories, this puts things into perspective. This made me realise im not alone. I have matured so much since this whole experience started, this has been the only good thing to come out my depression. Don?t ever feel beaten by this bitter condition. We are all lucky to be alive, lets use our bodies and minds to its full potential and kick some ass on this planet while were here. Now is the time for action. Below is my list of motivational points to consider: EVERYTHING that you want from life has to be earned Nothing is worth worrying about. Every obstacle has a solution Anything is possible AIM HIGH Visualise your goals being achieved No such thing as failure, only learning experience Just laugh and smile as often as possible You can do anything you want to You are free to do what you want Have something to look forward to, e.g. holiday Reward yourself You are in control Locate the source of a bug and fix it Life is 10% what happens to us, and 90% how we react to it The time is now, don?t put things off e.g. ?will be happy once I get a job?

<HR SIZE=1>Posts: 4 | | Registered: Sat 19 Oct 2002 9:54</td></tr></table>
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Jeanette <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/faces/artistbirdie.gif" border="1" width="32" height ="32" ></td><td align=right> </td></tr></table></td><td width="74%" bgcolor=#eeeeee> <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/icons/posticon.gif"> "Re(1):Things are going from bad to worse" , Wed 30 Oct 03:31<HR SIZE=1> Dear Karla: I don't know how long you've been taking St. John's Wort, but it's not usually recommended for severe clinical depression, but just for depressions that are mild to moderate. I realize that you don't want to take antidepressant prescription medication, but if SJW doesn't help once you've taken it 4-6 weeks, you should really consider taking something stronger. Earlier this year I researched all the prescription meds on Google.com and decided that Wellbutrin had the least side effects, so I took it for 17 days and started feeling A LOT BETTER, but, I broke out in an allergic rash (looked like chicken pox) from head to toe, and immediately consulted my doctor who told me I had to stop taking Wellbutrin immediately 'cause I was allergic to it!! Most people are NOT allergic to it though. What I'm trying to say is that you might want to try Wellbutrin yourself if SJW doesn't help you. If you're determined not to though, at least increase your SJW from 3 to 4 tablets a day. It's very safe to do so. Also, if you start seeing a good therapist, whether a psychiatrist or not, that will be helpful for you also, but it seems that with clinical depression, anti-depressants, whether natural, like SJW or prescription, are the way to go, as it's essentially a chemical disorder. Many of us suffer from feelings of low self esteem, and when you're feeling better, your skin condition will not cause you to feel so badly about yourself. Please let us all know how you are doing and NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP...THINGS CAN CHANGE...I'VE BEEN THERE AND I KNOW. Jeanette

<HR SIZE=1>Posts: 39 | | Registered: Wed 25 Sep 2002 5:50</td></tr></table>
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Karla </td><td align=right> </td></tr></table></td><td width="74%" bgcolor=#dddedd> <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/icons/posticon.gif"> "Re(2):Things are going from bad to worse" , Wed 30 Oct 05:17<HR SIZE=1> Hey Jeanette, I did look into Wellbutrin but I can't get it for free because I don't have any health insurance and the only medicines I can get for free are Prozac and Celexia and I refuse to take either one of them. And besides when I was on Prozac, I felt no better. I was still suicidal after 2 and a half weeks on it and I heard that Prozac and Celexia can cause suicidal behavior. It's even written on the side effects sheet! I heard that Wellbutrin causes seizures in some people and that it was taken off the market for a while. It's such a shame that people who really need these medicines are scared to take them because of the horrible side effects. It makes you wonder if it's impossible to make an anti-depressant with less side effects and I think if Prozac and Celexia can cause a person to kill themselves then they should defineately be taken off the market! One lady had protested about Prozac, that it caused her son to commit suicide. Before I took Prozac I was a normal weight of 115 lbs, after 2 years on it I was 150 lbs!! Also it increased my breast size from a C cup to a DDD cup and when I got off it I had breast reduction surgery that costs me nearly $3,000 dollars! I have increased my dosage of SJW to 1200mg. I think it's this brand I have, Nature's Way that isn't doing the job. I'm going to get 5-HTP when I run out to see how that works. It's been 2 months since I've been on SJW. I started off with the Spring Valley brand for like 4 and a half weeks. It helped me a lot for the 1st 3 weeks then started weakening so I moved to Nature's Way. I read that Fish Oil with Omega 3 fatty acids helps most people who haven't had any success with SSRI's so if all fails I will get that.

<HR SIZE=1>Posts: 70 | | Registered: Tue 10 Sep 2002 15:9</td></tr></table>
<table width=100% cellspacing="1" cellpadding="5" border="0"><tr> <td width="26%" bgcolor=#eeeeee valign=top> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpading=0 border=0><tr valign=top><td align=left> spinningplates </td><td align=right> Home Page <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/home-1.gif" border=0> </td></tr></table></td><td width="74%" bgcolor=#dddedd> <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/icons/posticon.gif"> "Re(1):Things are going from bad to worse" , Tue 29 Oct 19:15<HR SIZE=1> hey Karla, I agree with elizabethe, you need to talk to a counselor or therapist like I did. They're less creepy than psychiatrists. They can help you get a better outlook in life. It's not about someone prescribing you meds and then sending you home, but it's about a caring person to help you get through your problems. From the attitudes I have observed in this forum, you know we all support each other because we want all of us to get better. Your in my prayer.

<HR SIZE=1>Posts: 35 | | Registered: Tue 8 Oct 2002 19:36</td></tr></table>
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elizabethe </td><td align=right> </td></tr></table></td><td width="74%" bgcolor=#eeeeee> <IMG SRC="http://www.sjwinfo.org/forums/graphics/icons/posticon.gif"> "Re(1):Things are going from bad to worse" , Tue 29 Oct 17:56<HR SIZE=1> I'm sorry youre having such a ruff time. These past two days must feel endless for you. It sounds like you need someone to talk to. If youre uncomfortable going to your psychiatrist what about a counselor at school? You have a lot of stuff going on. Hang in there.

<HR SIZE=1>Posts: 12 | | Registered: Thu 10 Oct 2002 5:53</td></tr></table>
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